Alan Levi’s song focuses on the path of a small boat out at sea in a big stormy night. As we’ve pondered what God is speaking to us at the start of a new year in a difficult place doing difficult things, I’ve clung to the truths of this song. “Slaves to the Compass” chronicles the brave and wise sailors that must abandon themselves to a higher power, an unseen force that will guide them home, their compass. We too are slaves to the Compass – the unseen force of our Creator and Savior who is our only sure way home in the midst of these turbulent times in our hearts and lives. I love the way the last verses of the song say it:

It’s a matter of faith

In an unchanging force

It’s an act of believing

Just to stay

On the course
It’s a turbulent time

These are dangerous and difficult days

We can drift and just hope

we luck up on the way

But the winds of the world

will play tricks on our hunger for home

They promise safe harbor

then strand us to drown all alone
And the chorus:

Any good sailor

Is aware of his weakness

Any brave sailor

Has respect for the wind

Any wise Sailor

Knows he must be a slave

To the compass

A slave to the compass

If he’s going to get home again.

These do feel like dangerous and difficult days. Days when we must stay the course as an act of believing. As we look ahead to what promises to be another very challenging year, we feel God’s wind moving behind us. We feel the beginning of the Holy Spirit blowing into our sails and we know that with God as our compass, we will reach safe harbor in good time.

On this mountain

the Lord Almighty will prepare

A feast of rich food for all peoples

A banquet of aged wines

The best of meats and the finest of wines.
On this mountain he will destroy

The shroud that covers all nations.

He will swallow up death forever.

The sovereign Lord will wipe away

the tears from all faces

He will remove the disgrace of his people

From all the earth.
The Lord has spoken.

- Isaiah 25

Being back in Bundibugyo, the greatest impression has been of the shroud. Or as another version of the Bible puts it, “the veil that covers the faces of all people.” It’s the sense of whole clans of people, obscured. Of goodness cloaked in darkness. Of what is right perverted to wrong. It manifests itself in ugly behaviors of all kinds and it makes me long for the mountain feast.

We need tears wiped away in Bundibugyo. We need disgrace removed. We need death to be swallowed up in victory. And a feast wouldn’t hurt much either. Charles preached on Christmas morning on Revelations 12 and endless chicken in heaven. A whole nother reality that is hard for anyone, let alone the poorest, to get their minds around. Jesus, come quickly.

Nairobi was a quick but very full two day stop. We stayed with wonderful friends, the Davii, who welcomed us in with great food, a super-comfortable bedroom and total care. What a gift our time with them was. I knew it was going to be a good stay when Jess stated frankly during one of our first talks together: “This is a safe place, don’t feel afraid to say anything you need to say. We’re not here to judge, we’re here to listen.” The mission field has taught them to be better listeners than judgers, to see more grey than black and white, to realize that who Jesus is is far more complicated than we normally realize. For me especially, their willingness to listen, to emphathize, to hear our hearts, was a great gift.

Kyle’s love language must be acts of service because that guy served us non-stop our entire time. Laying aside a full-time ministry and a half-finished master’s degree program, he chauffered us around Nairobi, made room for long talks, shopping and making me breakfast cappaccino! The driving was no small gift. The Davii live in an area just outside of Nairobi but it took us over four hours through incredible Nairobi traffic to reach their home from the airport. That would have been one expensive taxi ride!

Most special of all was watching N and Q reconnect with Lexi and Beckett. We met the Davis family at our five week missions training in Colorado back in 2006. Two years and many hard experiences later our children reconnected over their shared lives as mission kids in East Africa. As we entered Jomo Kenyatta Airport and prepared to meet up with the Davii, Quinn had to ask, ” Mom, does Beckett speak English?” Two years away was too long for a good memory of his friend. But indeed, Beckett speaks English, has shared the proximity to violence and the watching of suffering. Knows what it’s like to change everything about life multiple times in the transitions to and from America. Has friends of every shade and many languages. These four are TCK’s – Third Culture Kids – and they re-bonded instantly. Lexi and Naomi played Petshop for hours while Q and Beckett fought with light sabers up and down the stairs.
Meanwhile I had a wonderful opportunity to meet with some experts at Tumani Counseling Center, an AIM-sponsored ministry to missionaries, to talk about the experiences of the last year, life stress and the idea of adding adopted children to our family. Through a “coincidence” the woman I happened to meet with has a specialty in cross-cultural adoption. Having this woman listen to me and affirm my journey through life in many ways was like having truth breathed into my heart and soul. I am still amazed at how God met me in her office.

After this sweet and relaxing two days Kyle dropped us at the Nairobi train station for the next leg of our journey- Mombossa!

What a month it’s been. Feels like it’s been ages since Thanksgiving week and our whirlwind end-of-school rush. After two weeks in the sand, sun and peaceful ocean sounds we feel like different people. Different people who weren’t quite ready to come back to the same place!

I am struggling with what I have heard is a common “coming-back” phenomenon in bundi. It’s the joy of coming home to our own home and to familiar faces and places, sounds and smells. The joy, juxtaposed with the rude surprise of what “home” really is in bundibugyo. Not just the physicial inconveniences but the constant demands, the ungratefulness, the sadness and sorry and losses of these people.

Tonight we were out on the roads Christmas caroling. Poor Heidi got stuck with the bag of candy that we were passing out to kids at each stop. After a few houses we were like pied pipers, attracting a large and ever-growing crowd of children who kept trying to masquerade as newcomers at every home so as to get another lolly. It is a little cute, a little sad, a little annoying. But it actually made me really angry. Because I am having a hard time with this being home. I am having a hard time being back.

N, Q and I all have bad head colds/sinus infections/laryngitus. We arrived home just one day before Christmas so our Christmas Eve was unpacking and washing vegetables and dishes and clothing by hand because it is a worker holiday so we had no house help. It was also a day for about bajillion visitors who have been WAITING for our return to get some pre-Christmas “help” in the form of cash. You can’t very well turn those people away. Sweet little orphans whose school fees I pay and little old ladies who will have no christmas otherwise. They were a joy to give to.

And also a joy were the students and friends who came by with little gifts. I always want to cry when someone with NOTHING still finds something to give me. It’s a gesture, a really big gesture, of love.

So much good news to report and I’ll post pictures soon of our trip. For now it is five am on Christmas morning, the gifts are wrapped and the decorations are up.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Betty and her daughter Bethany posed for us at their party. We say “see you soon” as we hope and pray Betty will rejoin the CSB team in future.

The perfect ending to our long year is . . . . The Indian Ocean! We are truly delighted for the chance God’s given us to celebrate our family’s survival this year by a trip to Diani Beach, Kenya over the next two weeks. We have found a perfect little beach cottage just steps from the coral stairs leading to the sand. This is hot season in Kenya, perfect beach weather, and we will have our own cook and access to fresh seafood, veggies and fruit from local villagers everyday. Sounds like heaven. The thing that makes it truly perfect is sharing it with the three people I love best; David, Naomi and Quinn!

Yesterday our journey began with the first leg, automobile. For the first time I drove the whole way from Bundi to Kampala including scary nightime in the city with it’s huge drainage ditches inches from my wheels. David cut his hand pretty badly just before we left home (nearly needing stitches) so his hand needed rest. It’s an exhausting journey to make and each time I forget how tiring. After a full day of bumping, jolting and rattling along we were truly ready for a good Kampala restaurant dinner and a full night’s sleep.

Now today we’re off to Nairobi by plane! We will spend two days there with wonderful friends we met at MTI who have children just N and Q’s ages. What a treat. Then on by TRAIN to Mombassa and again by FERRY to Kijiji (well mostly by taxi but there is a ferry leg!) In Africa, most of the adventure is getting there so pray for safe and enjoyable legs of our journey and for deep soul rest as we play in the sand and sun. We have another big year ahead of us and perhaps big changes for our family. Pray for God to meet us in each other, in conversation, prayer and good books. Pray for our children’s hearts to be shored up in our love and His. Pray for David and I to remember what it’s like to be JUST husband and wife. The words “Christ School” are completely verboten during this trip!